Between slowly descending into the depths of insanity, and being aware of that decent, lies a debate as to which is scarier. The very act of debating however, is an act of rationality and thus must be carried out within the shrinking, fragile bubble of sanity that is left. It is an unpredictable race with an outcome that ultimately does not matter, for succeeding in finding an answer or failing which, there is still naught to do but descend further. If the irresistible allure of insanity is fought with tenacity and adamance, it just might be combated and forced to retreat. It may shrivel to the size of but a minuscule seed, a tiny harmless threat, but it will never truly fade away. It will always lurk in the dark recesses, waiting for water, light, and a chace to grow again; a chance to seize complete and utter control.
Relax,
Relapse,
Sink further than before,
And then some.
This raises some questions, like whether you can be insane and aware of it, since insanity is basically living in a altered reality which doesn't have to be based on anything objective. Which then queries the sanity of everyone. There's the makings of a movie here, where everyone is insane and there's only one sane person in the whole world, which causes everyone else to think HE'S the one who's insane.
And what if you WANTED to go insane?
The loss of a close one, the loss of security, the loss of everything that was expected to last. A dozen different reasons which could cause one to want insanity, figuring that it's actually easier to get by when you're not rational.
A plea for insanity,
A feeble crippled cry,
A longing for the numbness,
But a denial from his presence.
A desperate crawl in his direction,
As he dances gleefully in circles,
About and around your haunted mind,
Taunting you before he skips away.
he brushes your shoulder upon the street,
Then slips away into the crowd,
He beckons at you from afar,
Tantalising you with a cruel charm.
You set your eyes upon him,
And he held your heart in his hands,
But much akin to a fragile flute,
He played you.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
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1 comment:
Hey, did you know that "deranged" means "insane"? I wonder why you chose that word for your blog title =)
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